Eight plus Kate with occasional guest cameos by Jon

Tonight marked a sad day in the history of the Gosselin Family. This hour long episode of TLC's prized reality show ended with Jon and Kate announcing their separation (with the closing credits confirming the legal filing for divorce). It was a really painful episode to watch. I kept hoping they would pull a switcheroo and edit the episode to create tension and end with a Jon and Kate announcing a recommitment to their relationship. But it wasn't so.

In a previous post, I've already shared my opinion that Jon and Kate would love their kids most by investing in their relationship. It just seems like they keep talking about how much they are "there" for their kids without realizing the pain and heartache that they are leading them though; without seeing the contradiction between the lessons that they are trying to teach and the their actions. Both Jon and Kate have issues to deal with in their individual lives and as a couple, but I think that Jon has more blame in the decay of this relationship.

He needs to grow up, act like a man, and take responsilbility for the committment that he made to Kate and to God to always love her, no matter what. Yes, Kate is hard on him. Yes, it must be ridiculously difficult to raise a family of 8 kids. Yes, the pressure of the papparazzi/media/and fans has got to be nearly overwhelming. But that's what being a man is all about; taking on the challenges that would seem to break us.

And as I was reminded in church on Sunday, you can't do it alone. You need other men. You need a supportive and encouraging wife. Above all, you need a powerful, loving, and relentless God. Let's pray we can learn from Jon and Kate.

Jon & Kate plus... hate??

"So what do you think of the whole Jon and Kate plus 8 stuff?", Becky asked me as we were driving home from visiting her folks over the weekend. I said that I thought things were probably being blown out of proportion; that it certainly must be extremely difficult to raise such a large family; and hopefully the new season would show a clearer picture of what is going on in their lives. Becky added that they are Christians so not only should they have their faith to rely on, but that they would also have people giving them Godly advice/assistance as well.

Then we watched tonight's Season 5 premier of Jon and Kate plus Eight. Oh my. It looks bad. Like really, awkwardly bad. (if you didn't see it, here's a pretty accurate review of what happened) I can't say that I'm a huge fan of the show, but I've followed it over the years. Becky watches every episode and I've seen most of them with her, and full disclosure, I read their book (multiple blessings) when she borrowed it from the library. I've become less and less interested in the show as it has changed from "how this couple handles the real life challenges of marriage and parenting" to "jon, kate, and the kids go on product placement adventures". But no matter my feelings of the show, it was really sad to see the poor status of their relationship.

Obviously there has been alot of public attention surrounding their family and the tabloids/paparazzi/scandals regarding jon and kate and their marriage. I know that I am not in their shoes and it has got to be incredibly difficult to keep that family together and raise those kids in a loving and responsible way, but both Jon and Kate appear to be totally missing the point in their family right now. Both of them, repeatedly, said that they are totally focused on the kids and they will always love them, but someone needs to tell them that they need to show their kids what love really is by loving each other. Love does not mean giving everything to one person or group at the exclusion of another. You don't teach your kids anything by telling them about it, you teach them by living it. Loving their kids should mean showing the kids how to love another person when times are tough.

I really hope Jon and Kate can save their marriage. So they can teach their kids what love really is. So they can learn what love really is. So America can see what love really is.

a quick word of advice

Evan and Aaron have discovered the joy of sword fighting. Fortunately at this point they prefer to fight me instead of beating the sense out of each other. I really like playing Star Wars or Pirates with them (then again, I'd probably play with just about anyone). As a result of our "fights" I feel that I am in a position to offer some advice to the future sword fighting fathers out there.

Every strike will hit your hand. As if your fist were an electro- magnet for swinging plastic edges. They are seriously unavoidable. You try to parry and block the blows, but the angles and speed are completely random preventing you from being able to predict the path of the oncoming sword. They couldn't be more precise if they were trying.

So, for those who are about to compete in the gladiatorial games of fatherhood, buy some hockey gloves. Or toughen up your hand by punching a tree Kill Bill style.

maintainance

About 2 weeks ago I found myself tackling the endless task of managing our overgrown lawn. Our yard isn't huge, but it needed more than just a once over with the mower. Mow, Trim, Edge, Weed; all the steps to keep your grass healthy, wealthy, and wise.

I was reaching the point of clean-up when Evan and Aaron came outside and with no instruction began to sweep and clean up the sidewalk. I didn't ask them to do it and I could see that they enjoyed working together and helping me.

It was so cool to experience as a Dad. I got to see a bit of their potential as men, to see a bit of the fruit of all our lessons and teaching moments, time-outs and discipline. Don't get me wrong, we have great kids, it's not like they are uncontrollable hellions. However, you don't always see such clear evidence of your hard work.





I'm hanging on to that memory for a long time.

tub time

Wow, time has really flown by since my last post. We're only a few days away from having our new baby girl and we've been preparing the house like crazy. Just a couple of days ago I was home alone with the boys and I was washing dishes in the kitchen while Evan and Aaron were playing together in the other room.

I was really happy because they were playing well together and i was able to get alot done. As i was finishing up i thought to myself 'i wonder what they're up to?'




They were busy moving half of their toys into the bath tub (and they would have brought over the rest if i hadn't have stopped them). I love how happy they are about their antics.

A little bit of mischief, but not too much mess; you gotta let your kids get away with something:)