fantasy letter

Dear Philip,

Why do you hate me? What did I ever do to cause you so much pain that you would seek revenge upon me at this crucial moment?

I just needed you to play half-way decent. I didn't need a record breaking game, or even a good game; even average would have been good enough. But no, you had to play a horrible game; a ridiculously embarrassing game. I mean, 104 yards passing, 2 interceptions, and a lost fumble? You tease me by playing great when I bench you and then as soon as I start you, you play a game like this one.

We'll no more. I've found someone else, and his name is Jason, Jason Campbell. He's not much, but he's much more reliable.


[for those of you reading this letter who are not Philip Rivers, this message is in response to the fact that I had a really big match-up this week in fantasy football and all i needed was for him to score 2 points. 2 measly points. but what did he get?... -3. MINUS THREE. i'm moving on.]